Having struggled with tiredness and an under-active thyroid for the last four years, running has been last on the list of things I wished to do. At the same time my weight has slowly crept up to the yellow point and I find myself looking less convincing when advocating a healthy diet and exercise regime to my children. This spring, as school was drawing closer to the holidays, I realised just how unproductive and moody my year had been. I had not helped out at the children’s school as much I as I would have liked to, my own University course was quickly failing, especially after my computer deleted my essay, and my health was not improving, despite my course being about nutrition. I felt strongly that the Universe (and yes I am aware of unconventional this sounds) wanted me to do something else. So I stopped right there and decided to take stock. As I did so I came across a book called ‘Scream Free Parenting’. This book made me realise, among other things, that I am not responsible for my children, I am responsible TO them. It really was an epiphany to me.
Now the next book I stumbled across, this time on my own bookshelf, was ‘Running Made Easy’. It was well read and much less used… Well this time I ran, I amazed my self, I saw the sunrise, I breathed the fresh air into the bottom of my lungs, and I had another revelation! I am going to run the Brighton Marathon. I am going to do it for me and for the future.
Now I have been on a few more runs, every time I amaze myself, but when it gets hard I hold the thought that the very air that breath is helped by the cause I am running for.
I think I have caught the running bug and I hope it is here to stay…
Unbelievable! I am lost for words over my own madness…
Yesterday I became an official member of the WWF Panda Team for the 2014 Brighton Marathon.
Why? You might wonder, because I certainly do; I cannot run for more than 15 mins and when I do my knees, legs and back hurt. I know nobody with money to share and I have very little time or ideas for fundraising.
But I think that is just it. It is a challenge that seems so far fetched that when I complete it I will feel like I have achieved something. I have also come to the realisation that our children don’t do anything we tell them to do, but they do some of the things we do. Thereby I can be in with a chance of ensuring my kids will grow up as healthy individuals that fulfil their dreams and goals by simply doing the very same thing.
I am thinking also of the monk, Bernard of Clairvaux, and his writings on the love of God. There are, according to Bernard, four levels of love;
1st Level = I love me for my benefit
2nd Level = I love you for my benefit
3rd Level = I love you for your benefit
4th Level = I love me for your benefit
I feel that, throughout my life, I have somewhat worked through the first 3 levels; in regards to both my love of God and my relationships. I am now ready for the fourth level, and this is what my beautiful God of the Universe has called me to do first!
May I not forget it in November at six o’clock in the morning, in the rain when it is time to train…!